Because The Musician plays in a lot of bars, I spend a lot more time in bars than I used to. I never have been a big fan of the bar scene, but I love watching my man play with a band. Yesterday, they were playing at one of their regular bars. It’s a quirky spot with a really nice group of regulars. This is a country bar, and all the regulars two-step…. something I haven’t learned to do yet.
   Yesterday, there was an odd man at the bar. I saw him go up to some of the band members and give them hand signs rather than exchange words. This seemed odd, and he also seemed aggressive. I was trying to pay attention to the band, and not this strange guy. I was hoping he had left, but that was not the case.
   This odd man came very quickly across the room to the table I was sitting at, slammed his bag down on a stool, slammed his beer down on the table, and motioned to me that he wanted me to dance with him. I shook my head no and said that I didn’t dance. He paused a beat, and then he grabbed my wrist hard and tried to physically pull me onto the dance floor. I again told him no. He seemed to get aggravated, but he left me alone after that…although he stayed in my proximity for a while which made me uncomfortable. My wrist was smarting for several minutes, and my head spun. This happened in a crowded bar on a Sunday afternoon….10 feet away from my boyfriend and his band mates, and across the table from several friends….and nobody saw. I went through two different scenarios in my head. Clearly, this guy was drunk, and also there was something”off” about him. I didn’t really get hurt, he stopped after the initial attack, and I didn’t want to cause a scene. On the other hand, I felt very violated. I had already said no, and he tried to physically force me. His behavior was not acceptable whether it was observed or not, and he was a threat to other women in the bar. At the next break, The Musician and I went outside and I told him what had happened. He didn’t want to cause a scene at a place where he works, so he quietly explained the situation to the bouncer and asked him to take care of it. The guy caused a big to do when he was asked to leave….trying to sneak back in, and getting the bouncer so mad he was yelling at the guy. I did not want to witness it if a fight was going to happen, so we snuck back in the side door.
   Later that night, when the band leader heard about it he said to let them know right away if anything ever happened again. It’s nice to know they have my back, but said that we live in a world where it’s so common.


One thought on “Assault?

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