The Hardest Part

The hardest part of my divorce has not been the loss of family, the financial strain, or the effect on my children….the hardest part has been watching the person who my partner decide to remove himself from our daughters life. When we were waiting to go into the courtroom this week, he complained to me that he had not agreed to a change in custody, only visitation.To me, they were one in the same. How can you go from 4o℅ custody to a single weekly visit for a few hours (which is  much more than than once a month couple hours visit that he is actually having), and still say that you are a custodial parent?  He got mad and said he would ask the judge…..the judge agreed with me, and saw that the custody change was what I asked for in the original order. My ex wants all of the benefits of being a parent (like a say in decisions), but none of the responsibilities of actually being a parent.

It’s heartbreaking to watch what a sad person he’s become. I feel sorry for him, knowing that he goes home to that terrible woman at night. His pettiness is beyond belief. I went into that courtroom and asked for a continuance because of his health issues (which I fully realize are inflated), and he refused to allow it. The judge was shocked…he told my ex that this was a gift….people don’t do this, I was being gracious and he should accept it. He has become so mean and petty that he would not allow it, and I just didn’t want to fight. I don’t want to fight him on every damn thing. I took the matter off calendar, and will probably re-file at some point. Even though I lost out on the extra money that I know I would be getting, I felt like being in control was a win for me. The judge told him once again that he was lucky and should appreciate it, but I know he doesn’t.

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