Insomnia and Ramblings

I’m lying in bed at midnight, not sleeping…..stress insomnia due to finals, and Christmas, and life….and I’m thinking about Bean (a play on his last name).

He seems like a genuinely thoughtful and caring person. One evening, he needed an Uber. He called me to see if I was available before just calling in the request. It was sweet and considerate, and also showed that he wanted to see me. One night, we fell asleep cuddling. When I woke him up to tell him that I was leaving, he jumped up to walk me to my car….which is pretty impressive from a dead sleep in the middle of the night. I called him tonight, and got his voicemail. He texted right away to let me know that he was with his kids and couldn’t talk.
He’s so different in the bedroom, though. Very Dominant. I have encountered the type before, and not had a good experience. I like a man to be in control in the bedroom, but I also like him to give the control to me sometimes. I’m not sure yet if Bean can do this. He was very sure of himself and what he wanted. He liked to give my hair just a little tug as he was kissing me. I’m not sure if I wasn’t vocal enough, or he just liked telling me what to say, but he did tell me what he wanted me to say. Through this all, he still managed to be gentle and caring….it’s a tough balance. I liked the way that he was, it wasn’t too controlling or rough like my past experience. This was just the first time, and we will certainly work things out as we spend more time together. I am a little concerned that he didn’t reach orgasm, though. I really tried to get him there, but he never got very hard even though he sounded like he was enjoying himself. He may be in need of some little blue pills.


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