It Doesn’t Take a Village…. but Sometimes I Need Help

  I always hated the “It Takes a Village” campaign. I don’t agree with it. I don’t think that it takes everyone in the community to raise a child. I think it’s the parents responsibility and that they can do most of it themselves. I may be more of a self sufficient parent than most Americans, though. When your child is born at home, sleeps in your bed, feeds at your breast, and is carried on your body, it is difficult to even have any help, but this is the way it is supposed to be. This process creates a bond between baby and parents that surpasses all others. My children were educated at my knee, and at the kitchen table, and in the world. I didn’t have much need for doctors, as they weren’t being vaccinated, and since my husband at the time worked long hours, brought work home and traveled for work, whatever needed to be done was done with the kids in tow.
   When the kids were little, we didn’t have any family around. When we did move closer to family, they weren’t much help anyway. We were those crazy Hippies with the vegetarian child….how could we support such a decision from a three year old?
   As they grew, I cultivated relationships with moms of their friends. This is my “village”. These are the women who sat in the courtroom with me as my marriage crumbled apart, who bought me shots to drown my sorrows, who made sure my Kiddo got to and from school and functions when I was working out of town. These are the women whose tables I sit at Holiday meals, and every day meals. They are the ones who call me when their car breaks down, their life breaks down, or they have a break down…because I have done the same.
   It doesn’t take a village to raise a child, but sometimes I do need help. We all do. It’s those that offer help before you even ask that are true friends.


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