He’s Moved On

   My ex-boyfriend has been checking in around The City. His check ins two days in a row in different locations so far from his own neighborhood indicate overnight stays. It is clear to me that he is seeing someone who lives in the city, and it feels like the check ins are for my benefit. He has moved on and he wants me to know. I put him on my acquaintance list so I don’t have to see it.
   I wish I could say that I am happy for him, but really I’m just too sad for myself. I’m also sad for both of them since I know how charming he is, and that he isn’t willing or able to deal with his communication problems so that he can have a healthy relationship. It’s just a matter of time before it explodes, in my opinion.
   Still, it hurts to see that he has found someone else and I am really struggling with being alone. My self esteem has really taken a hit lately, and it just feels like every fucked up guy I ever dated is more desirable than I am. Dirty Bathroom told me it had been 10 years for him without finding someone who lasted more than a month…..but there’s a serious reason for that. It makes me wonder if I am really just as fucked up…


3 thoughts on “He’s Moved On

  1. You know those songs you hear and think, that songwriter took the words right out of my mouth? That is how I feel about the majority of your posts. It’s weird to feel like you’re living parallel lives with someone. Weird and oddly comforting. Thanks for being so open.

    Liked by 1 person

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